6.11.2007

the family did not join me at big bear

the family did not join me at big bear
that set of pictures is from dean at the kid's race for big bear 2006
no family with me for big bear 2007
that was a great moment for dean
I would have loved to recreate that moment for dean and again and also for grant

it was tough
we wanted it to happen
but it just did not seem rational

the family at a 24 hour event can be a great deal of work
a great deal of work for both the mother and father... which ever is racing

lisa was more than willing to come up
we discussed it
but the thought of her driving up alone with the kids
then driving back with the kids
only to drive pretty much the same route to pittsburgh later this week to visit the grandparents

it was too much to ask
it is too much to ask for lisa to hang with the boys while I hang with the fellas and ride my bike
and I appreciate it
I appreciate her
she had a great weekend
the boys had a great weekend
and thanks to lisa I had a great weekend

there were times when I missed them
at one point during the weekend MikeK's daughter gave me a hug
sure she had given me 35 high fives and told me she remembered me 16 times
enough time had passed for emma's kid brother jeremy to stop saying no to all of my questions and give me a handful of high fives
when emma gave me a hug I missed my kids
when the kids were running around with other kids I missed my kids
when the kids gathered for the 24 minutes of big bear I missed my kids
but... when a kid went missing I was no longer missed my kids
when the kids woke up in the night uncomfortable in the tent I was no longer missing my kids
when the kids wander off again... I no longer missed my kids
when children cried and complained.... I no longer missed my kids
yet overall... I missed my kids
all the while realizing that it was best my kids were not there
I am not sure if I had the energy and the focus for both the race and the family
it is hard enough to focus on the race
that takes energy enough

I was jealous to see tom vaughn and his family camping together
mikek and susan had emma and jeremy
redlack told me that he and liz did not feel that they were ready to camp yet with their son
the moms did a whole lot to keep the kids entertained while the boys raced
I hope that lisa's weekend at home with the boys was easier than if she had come up to the race with the boys
cause camping with kids can be tough
cause one parent watching two kids can be tough
one parent watching two kids while camping can be maddening

I am so appreciative of lisa and all that she does for the family
I missed my family
I want to hang and camp with my family
but I was feeling overextended with just racing
my energy may not have been there for the family
which means that although I missed them... it is best that they did not make the trek
racing can be exhausting and I was exhausted
exhausted on and off the trail
near bonking on each lap
maybe bonking on my dawn lap

dean, grant, and I talked about camping
maybe camping at a non-race event
there will be fishing, canoeing, and swimming in a lake along with that camping
the kids had some racing fun at the CSC Invitational
(dean and grant at the csc invitational)

rocky gap park may be the family option for camping
need to look at a calendar and make this happen

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