8.26.2007

I often ask myself... how do they let that happen?


I often ask myself...
how do they let that happen?
how do fat people get so fat?
people are huge
people are massive
people are awkwardly large
people are so fat that they are unhealthy

and I ask myself...
how do they let that happen?

this weekend while away with the family lisa snapped some shots of me and the boys on a floating dock on Lake Laura near Bryce Mountain
I looked at the shots with a bit of a shock
I am huge

I am massive
I am large and pale
how did this happen?

no I am not obese
no I am not exactly fat
compared to people who are skinny I am fat
compared to people who are fat I am not fat
I could be more thin
perhaps I should be more thin
to be quite honest... I thought I was more thin
not that I thought I was thin
but I thought that I was thinner than I am
and well... I am not
no... I do not know how this happens
yes... it helps me to be a little more sympathetic of others

to all the people whom I judged at the walmart today... I am sorry for judging you
to all the people who I acted better than at the county fair a few weeks ago... I am sorry that I snubbed you

we all see ourselves captured at our best
you know... the myspace photo
when actually... our appearance is something different
how does the mirror lie?
how did I not see my go from extra large to extra extra large?

illana the iguana took some shots of me from the cranky monkey number three
I wondered when I saw these if these were just bad shots from bad angles
then seeing the photos from this weekend I saw the truth
my gut is huge
my gut is massive
how did this happen without me noticing?
how did this happen without me doing anything about it?

not sure why
it has been a long time that photos of me depict the before and not the after

9 comments:

Mark said...

It happens.

Sometimes it happens because you're not paying attention to aging, and still drink like you're 19. Or maybe you had an accident, and the body never quite works the same. Or maybe it's for no reason at all, other than work, home, life.

And then you fix it. Or maybe you don't. Depends on whether you notice it in time, I think.

Tom said...

Ha!
I got a real good laugh off of this.
My first lesson learned while biking, jerserys are the worst things to have your picture taken in.
For a small fee, I'll stand next to you at all photo-ops.
In comparison to me, you'll look anorexic.

Seeya Sat or Sun.
Gorilla

Steve said...

You're joking, right?
You're not fat. Me, now I'm fat. I've been riding all summer to work (26 miles round trp, 3-4 days a week) and I feel like I haven't lost pound one.

Jim said...

Dude, I'm totally the wrong guy to ask. Though you'd probably come up with some funny free verse about it.

"Was the fat Coppi going to eat me too...
Strangely fast for such a big guy.
I think there was a donut shop near the finish line."

Or something like that.

Your distress saddens me. But on the other hand, as I've been slimming down for a while, I look at my pictures and go, "Whoa! What a fat bastard." Then I stop and think and go, "Which isn't half as bad as I used to be." Sometimes the glass is half full, sometimes it's half empty, and sometimes it's your round.

gwadzilla said...

I feel good on the bike
I just do not look pretty for the camera

I am not depressed by this observation
I am just shocked that I do not look how I feel

I feel like I am at race weight
while I look like I am still at winter weight

sydney_b said...

I got a laugh out of this one. If you feel and race strong, then you're at race weight no matter how the jersey fits. :D

gwadzilla said...

it is funny...

people are so considerate of the emotions of fat people

even my children

the other day we saw this man who was fat
so fat that he had trouble walking

my younger son made mention of this man being fat
an observation
not a criticism
my older son then said we should stop talking about him as it may hurt his feelings
even with him out of earshot
somehow he thought another fat person may hear us
not sure if he thought that the next fat person would think that we were talking about them
or if these fat people would eventually meet at the all you can eat buffet table and discuss their pain for being mocked

either way
it is nice that my boys are considerate

but it is funny this PC notion

people are rarely so concerned for the emotions of a drug addict
do people consider the sensitivity of a junkie
no
they try to have an intervention
they are not concerned with hurting anyone's feelings
they try to give it to them straight

so why do people tip toe around the topic of obesity?

I could be more thin
but I do not need an intervention
agreement that I could be more thin is more helpful that saying that I am not fat
I think that is the type of behavior that lets things get out of hand

I love to eat
sorry
it is one of my many weaknesses
but I think I need to get it into control
do I really need that second pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream at midnight?
maybe I can just stop at one
better yet
I need to close the kitchen at ten thirty

wars are won with small battles
I am losing the small battles

Bob said...

I'm fat but working on it. Body mass index just below the obese lines according to the government. Used to be 325 lbs. Now 210. Doc sez 175, 170 ideal. He runs marathons, but has never sprinted in bunch at 35 mph. I would look over an wink at him. Fat guys can move.
Boz
http.//diabetictifosi.spaces.live/

Craig said...

Just read this . . . . I am not alone. Sometimes I feel alone when all my riding partners are slimmer than I am.
But I feel fast on the bike - I am faster than my light weight trainign partners . . . .that's got to be something, right.
I like what you said, something to the effect of"at race pace but winter weight".
Time to do something about this though. Change some behaviors - cause thinking about it ain't going to change anything.
Cheers!