my young cousin wrote something that I found on the internet today

Rebecca in Paris

this entry was made by her late last year

in 1991 a year after college graduation I was feeling a little anxious...
the months between college graduation and the rapidly approaching summer had been fun packed, but lack something....but I was not sure what. During those months were I worked as a messenger and also spent a just shy of 2 months traveling the south with two friends where we spent the majority of that time planting trees in Georgia. As summer got to be closer I developed a plan...I was going to ride cross country via motorcycle. It was a half cocked plan. It took some creative orcestrating.....had to sell one motorcycle....buy another...get that motorcycle running then tagged/insured/etc. The plan was in the background, very few people knew of this plan, but when it came to surface it all just sounded like talk in a bar.

more on this later
I may leave work early
so would rather finish working here and go ride my bike

THE MONKEY HAS LANDED!
At the first available opportunity I will deploy all personal to move in on the arrival location! The MONKEY must be greeted and welcomed into its new home!
now to try and convince my boss that I need to leave early.....

last comic standing....
bummer
total bummer
tonight I was doing a little channel surfing (and I told you I don't surf) when I passed through a quasi-reality show, The Last Comic Standing.
It was seconds before I saw DC Benny was going to be one of the competitors. Having seen him before I knew that he could be funny, having gone to high school with him I knew he was a nice guy and deserved a break. Enough with the intro...ran downstairs and came back with a glass of wine, just in time for the show to start back up with a few reality bites of Ben's life, then he was on the stage. His opening was weak and fell dead....he responded to the crowd's lack of response....but...being a professional and a fighter he came back, but the time limit was not in his favor....he finally transitioned into some humor, the crowded started to respond positively. They rebounded well, but before he could move from the Indian Rapper Bit....time had run off and he ran off the stage. The previous performers had all hung out for a little clever Q&A response time where they could showcase a little improv back and forth.
Not that his career was hinged on this one event, but it did seem like it could be a good break for an aspiring comic. Perhaps he has a bigger opportunity around the corner and this had to dispell so he could be open to the next.

BLOGGER'S BLOCK
It is happening again...the time is here and I have nothing to say (yet I blog on anyway) The other day while out on the bike I had a few quality blog ideas race through my head...even had a few catch statements. All I needed to do was sit down and start typing and link all those catch phrases together. Needless to say nothing is coming to surface. The clock is ticking and quiting time is rapidly approaching...there are a few final minutes where I could maybe jot down these ideas.
unlikely

two ideas for later
Freaks and Super Freaks
and
Popcorn

Clinton Forced to Settle on Shortening his Book Title!

Soon the book stores will be flooded with Bill Clinton's memoirs, "My Life." Shortly after that Bill Clinton's hotel (or maybe motel) room will be flooded with groupies and would be interns....it is going to be bigger than the American Idol auditions. Lucky for the ladies like Monica, Bill is not as critical as Simon. After the lawyers met for many days at the mediation table it was established that Bill could not use his original book title as it is already associated with a classic foreign film; "My Life as a Dog."

Nice Breasts......Nice Rims!
This is a tough post to try and compose as the written word can be so incriminating, but I feel that Lisa is accepting that I will look at other women until I am blind or until I am dead. Hopefully writing this post will not have Lisa kill me or blind me....
The other day I was walking down the street when I saw these two women walking down the block. They had similar builds; long, tall, and lean; each with rather small breasts. The site was taken in with the same pleasure of viewing the setting sun, I looked at them as they passed as if it were the sun dipping off the horizon, just soaking it in and allowing it to disappear, enjoying the warm glow knowing it would soon be gone. Once they passed I thought to myself....those were two very attractive women. In a certain way their small breasts were an asset rather than a detracting. Had they each had large breasts I feel that most onlookers (maybe even me) would have zeroed in on the breasts and missed out on the other features. Yes, other features....the shape of the eyes, the curve of the nose, the muscular angles of the legs....okay you get the point, no need for me to go any further as we all know the components of the female form. With that said.....a boob job can be like some flashy rims on a nice car. The car goes down the block with its sharp lines and smooth curves, all the while the eyes are drawn in towards the spinning chrome...and the rest of the car is over shadowed by the wheels/rims. Almost as if the rest of the car does not matter....seconds later you could ask the gapping onlookers what color the car was and you are sure to get a blank stare and an audible, "dah, I don't know....but those were some nice rims!"

Why BLOG?
this is a very odd little passion/compulsion I have developed over the last year
it is a whole lot of fun, almost as much fun as my old SCRABBLE addiction on GAMES.com
that offered me so much, both game and chat, but not unlike THE BLOG it took so much of my energy and attention from the tasks at work
sure, right now I am REIMAGING one of the company user's new machines
and sure, my writing a blog is no different than someone else reading the paper, doing a cross word puzzle, or even playing that dreaded solitaire
yet, my rationalization gives some sort of admission of guilt
or worse yet, fear of my boss' disapproval
but...he left early and I am staying late, so I guess it is all okay
as long as I get my work done there is no complaint
if laptops were stacking up at my desk and the help line was ringing off the hook
and I was screaming "NOT NOW! I AM IN THE MIDDLE OF A BLOG!" well, then and only then I think I would have an issue, well, I may have an issue, but maybe then I would have a serious issue

on a similar related not of "WHY DO I BLOG?"
I typed out a tale of meeting Brooke Shields while mountainbiking a few entries ago
and it did not score even one comment
guess I should go back and edit it with a Pam Anderson and Paris Hilton sandwich

Another "why did I not think of that?!?"
Well, to quote the west coast hardcore punk band from the 80's DOA, "talk minus action equals ZERO!" I do come up with some great ideas from time to time, none of which are engineering or bike related, but you have to admit that my doubled sided tube of tooth paste AM/PM is a great idea (PM for night time, tryptophan or melatonin as a sleep aid and Am with caffeine for the morning brushing to get you going! But in a litigious society as this I can not risk any business venture that may risk me getting sued, so I stay poor and off the infomercial circuit)
Here is a very simple design that seems like a great modification of the downtube shifters!

I saw another great shifter "mod" that turned index road shifters into top bar mountain shifters some time ago, but can not find the link.

oh....I was never the biggest DOA fan growing up, most of my tastes stuck FAITHFULLY to the DC sounds and ideas, unless of course it came from across the pond (man I wish I had the UK SUBS Diminished responsibility on DC or THE DAMNED Machine Gun etiquette)

Weekend Update

Here is my WEEKEND UPDATE as typed up as a response to TimmyP's weekend update.....
and no this Weekend Update has nothing to do with SNL.

I Bill Clinton Narcoleptic?
On Friday at the Reagan funeral at the National Cathedral I caught a clip of Bill Clinton asleep at the funeral. Then today there was a press conference, looked like Bush was about to speak, Clinton was there as well. His head was down and he looked like he might be asleep, then when there was clapping at the arrival of Bush he snapped up as if from a bit of a nap.

That is my man Bill!
oddly I think that this gathering was for a portrait of Bill and a portrait of Hillary...separate portraits as they could not get them to be along side of each other long enough for the painter to make a sketch.

narcolepsy
Encyclopædia Britannica Article

Narcolepsy
a sleep disturbance that is characterized by sudden, uncontrollable spells of sleep during the day, with disturbances of sleep at night.

The syndrome usually occurs in youth or early adult life and is presumably due to dysfunction of the diencephalic reticular system. The narcoleptic can fall asleep anywhere, anytime—while in conversation, at work, while eating, …