more on music
growing up music was a huge part of my life
in the early years I use to run around the house while my mom cooked and cleaned, it seemed as if there was always some music playing in the background
Neil Diamond, Carly Simon, Carol King, or some other folk artist of the time

my brother and I were turned onto Jesus Christ Superstar at a young age
as our mother was (and still is) hyper religious we found this to be a way to satisfy her need for us to observe the death of Jesus on Good Friday

there are strong memories of coloring in coloring books to the Beatles
and when I began to discover music on my own independantly I would hear songs
as these song played my mind would reel
there would be strong memories of how I had heard all this music before
Tommy by the WHO must have been on the car radio, so many of those choruses were firm in my brain
there were odd songs by the DOORS, the not the obvious ones, but ones that must have also been on the radio as I was a young child
certain music would enter and exit my life at different stages
Led Zepplin was to be discovered, disguarded, rediscovered then disguarded, to only be rediscovered again and now is currently disguarded
the WHO some how rang big through my high school years, but gets little airplay on my system now days
well, other than some phases of QUADROPHENIA
back to where I was originally headed with this whole RANT

music was not just in the background
but it was in the foreground of pop culture
it was something that peers learned that they had in common or lacked in common
it created peer groups
and it created identity
this became more clear as early as junior high
the classroom started to split
there were those that like to dance to the pop music on the radio
those who were discovering the harder side of rock
even those who were headed for metal
as for me....
there was a great appreciation for all rock and roll
my records and my interests went back to the birth of rock and roll
there were investigations
and shockingly enough I was reading
there were great songs that the Beatles and the Stones or even Hendrix were playing
and I had discovered that they were covers
so I researched the history of rock and roll
and took it all the way to the presend day
it was the late 70's
not too late to catch the tale end of the brith of punk
aware enough to monitor the news
a Death at a WHO concert
the death of the WHO drummer
and the death of one of the Beatles
the day John Lennon was shot I stayed home from school sick
went to the local drug store and bought all of that day's papers
there were clippings to read and to be collected
it was impossible to sort out why.

then onto high school where grouping became more clear
many students were obvious to to peg as a fan of pop, while another looked like a Dungeon and Dragons playing RUSH fan!
the fans of a certain band would effect my choice as to whether I would listen to or allow myself to like a certain band
I have never to this day been able to listen to RUSH because of my lack of allegance to the RUSH fans in high school
and the same went for the followers of the Grateful Dead, but I lightened my feelings and accepted the music, but never the HEADS themselves
(as Ultimate frisbee and some other passtimes of the Deadheads were fun for me, I could not help but accept that soundtrack to that day, that era, or that memory)

music helped me to form my own personal identity

it is hard to sum up the formation of my identity on the fly
there are many factors that come into play
divorced parents/remairried father/being the youngest of three/moving around a fair amount
there was also the fact that I never was part of the "in crowd"
had some friends
but often was not accepted
often did not fit in

played all sorts of sports
select soccer
cyo basketball
rode my bike
I had my friends
but never really fit in

and with music it was pretty much the same
I ended up taking what I enjoyed of each subculture and leaving the rest behind
by 11th grade I was counter culture, perhaps post punk
my hair was cut funny
and when I had the opportunity to dye it, I risked the consequences of being grounded
and took that fashion risk
there was ridicule
but there was reward
in high school I was no trend I was all trends
I played soccer, volleyball, and ran track
went to high school dances, went out to bars to go dancing (clubs on the alternative night) and went to punk shows (DC Hardcore.)

rather than join any one sub culture I floated between all of them

having never really fit into any one group had given me a liscence to join any and all groups

this carried onto college where I skateboarded, played varsity soccer, lived on the lacrosse hall, sailed with the sailheads on big wind days when they wanted a big crew, played ultimate when the team hosted tournaments, and went to any party that had a keg

where is this rant going?
it is going to get me fired if I do not PUBLISH AND POST and get back to work