5.05.2005

i am alive
surgery is behind me
it was magic
not like the magic of eye contact and a wide smile shared with one of my sons
but rather black magic, scary black magic
magic too dark/too scary for harry Potter
magic too dark/too scary for Star Wars
more like Rosmary's Baby*
more like real life

it was over as soon as it began
time was remove
two hours of life zapped from my conscious being
one second I was lying down on the surgical table watching the nurses strap me in and send me off on a strange ride
something was added to my IV and I found myself hours later in the dressing room where it all began
there is no recollection of seeing the doctor in the operation room
although we may have spoken
there is an amnesia side effect

in this hospital lazy-boy-like chair I assessed my body
took in the surroundings
tubes were still in my nose and maybe my arm
as I slowly gained consciousness I made small talk with various nurses

they removed the tubes and I took a further measure of my condition
my left arm was heavy from the cast
my fingers were numb with a novacaine-like tingle
I felt like I may vomit
I felt like I was going to be sick
like a frat boy on spring break I asked for a trash can... just in case

things were not right
I had a major headache... headache... pain.... and confusion
with some fresh breathes I still felt like I may be sick... but felt in control
I requested to use the bathroom
my ability to walk needed assistance
like an old man I slowly moved to the bathroom

once in the bathroom I realized vomit may come
but only after diareha

I flet better after the bathroom
still felt like shit... but better
the desire to vomit was still present... but not as strong

fresh air was needed...
once back from bathroom my wife was there waiting for me

after some medical advice, medical appointments, prescriptions, and other hospital post op stuff I was released
it was a pretty routine process
in and out in an afternoon

not sure what happened in there
still not sure what is inside my hand
but... I am confident in the advice, actions, and opinion of my doctor

now the long road to recovery

first PT appointment for monday!

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