that title is a little bit inside the beltway
and well... beyond that
it is also a little bit Forest Gump
what am I talking about?
the Kenneth Starr Report...
what is the Kenneth Starr Report?
well... I am not sure how closely everyone followed this
myself... I followed it closely
although I did not watch a second of the run away white ford bronco with OJ Simpson
but I did pay close attention to the whole Monica Lewinsky thing
not sure of the years
or how long
but I was working for one of the news agencies as a messenger
I would mix driving my motor cycle, with my '66 Nova, and the company vehicles
the Suburban was always preferred over the Crown Vic... even without AC
and no... that is not a reference to OJ's driver
in any case...
I spent some time camped out front of Monica Lewinsky's place on New Hampshire Avenue
that was my job
along with a long list of camera men, soundmen, and other couriers
it was my job to sleep... wake to eat and then sleep again out front of 600 New Hampshire
she did not go out very often
and when she did
she went to places where there were already crews of camera men, sound men, and other couriers
was it the Cosmos Club?
I can not recall the details
so... the witch hunt was lead by a man named Kenneth Starr
maybe one r maybe two rs
not sure... can not recall that much
all that it did drag on and he basically botched it
but... yes... I know... long story short
when the Starr Report was released from the Congressional Printers that document was passed to a civilian to carry over to the Senate
or something to that effect
somehow the chose me... they handed this large envelope filled with print filled pages literally hot off the presses and I was asked to walk this to the Senate or some Senator's office... maybe Speaker of the House or the head of some committee
this all happened pre-Internet
but it was on film
the Capital Hill police escorted me through that labyrinth of hallways that meet with the subway and connect the buildings under ground
the camera crews and their sound guys walked backwards
pointing their cameras and their microphones at the random civilian selected to carry this governmental message to the people
or something like that...
what is cycling's version of the Kenneth Starr Report?
well... Lance Armstrong is the name in question and Performance Enhancing Drugs would be his Monica Lewinsky
they do not have a stained dress
but it does appear that they have people's testimony and people's word
check out this story in Sports Illustrated
Sports Illustrated is building up to a story that is going to be printed in the next issue of SI
here is an introduction to the line of attack against Lance Armstrong's claim that he is a clean athlete
I know I will read that story when it comes out
in other news in the Soap Opera that is professional cycling
Floyd Landis Retired From Cycling...
and he already wrote his book
Floyd Landis Gives Up on Pro Cycling Return After Comeback From Doping
that is a total Forest Gump memory...
and I have a number of em