let me try to lessen the tone with a reprint of an early posting
a posting that was actually an email
an email in my Pre-Blog State, yes there was life before BLOG

how does this happen?
my life is not a movie

so I a heading up Lamont Street after a days work this new cross bike
has put a little zest in my pedal so I am trying to finish my post work
ride strong as I pass David, Sharon, their two dogs and their newborn
baby ZOE I give a half hearted hello I am distracted things are not as
they should be the spot where I parked my car the day prior is filled
by a cab

I turn back down the block
and scan for my big blue truck
no sign of it
this truck is hard to overlook

I pass David and Sharon again
they laugh and ask if I am trying to get a little more exercise I tell
them my truck was stolen or towed Sharon laughs and says something to
the effect of how stupid we can feel when we forget where we parked our
car but I know where I parked my car and it is not there

I do one more scan and even try one street over I resign myself to the
fact my car has been stolen my heart rate has not changed this is life
in the city getting angry will not bring my car back

I go home
check some emails
make sure I did not get the latest email virus then jump into the
shower get out dry off no real rush only just had my truck stolen I
scan the phone book for the nonemergency number to call the police and
in walks lisa with the baby and the dogs I tell her the news.....my car
was stolen she says she saw it going down lamont just seconds ago she
figured it was me driving she knew it was my car by the red bumper
sticker that reads, "follow me and my SUV to the next gas crisis"

she thought it was parking in front of the halfway house a second does
not pass I am on the line with the police as I search frantically for
my license plate information I give the police the information and rush
to get a bicycle to see if I can chance on meeting with my truck

no lights
no helmet
no geeky reflective vest
I rush down the block like that crazy little chicken only my
exclamation has nothing to do with a falling sky but with a 17 year old
stolen truck my rant seems almost as absurd

I get down the block and there is my truck

oh silly me

sharon is right
I do feel stupid

I head for home
and think about how stupid I looked
as I approach up pulls DC's finest
they are sent on their way with my humblest apologies

I walk in and tell lisa that I was wrong it had not been stolen it had
been parked it further down the block she assures me that she saw it
being parked and assumed it was me driving it

without a word I rush back
sure enough
the engine is hot
and their is a trail of various fluids still damp in the road showing
the curve of a well parked truck off to the neighborhood 7-11 to get a
flat foot no luck back to call 911 as I spot a black and white, only it
is red white and blue with graphics that would be more fitting on a
clown car, but go unnoticed since they have decorated the cars for
nearly a decade he is headed the other way he call it in it is my job
to go back and guard my car

things start to feel a little crazy
am I mad?
the facts are reviewed and reviewed again and again surely that car was
not there 10 minutes prior there is no way I could have passed it am I
is this a scene from Memento?
what is happening here

as I wait for the police to return to the scene the tale and all of its
pieces are shared with any random passerby that will listen my rants
are mad one woman allows me to use her cell phone as I call 911 again a
suspicious car makes its third pass down the block she gets the plate

the police arrive
there are several cars
my story is told and retold
action is not happening
no one is interested in dusting for prints my story is unbelievable to
the officer the engine is not hot the drops of various fluid are not a
trail of clues in his eyes the engine does not appear to be hot to him
the doors are locked no evidence of forced entry no jimmied ignition
nothing just the rants of a bald bearded man

the story deviates very little as I tell it for the 50th time yet they
seem less than convinced the facts are there car parked there now here
engine hot I ride my bicycle to work

what more do they want!
my car was stolen!

all the long I am thinking
is my car stolen every day?
at times I notice the gas seems to be significantly lower than the last
time but it is always dispelled as my usual paranoia and the car runs
great for months and then something dramatic is different to me this is
the character of the car, but has someone been driving this car daily?

the car was well parked
a good parking job especially with the brakes failing as they are and
no disrespect to the car sure the steering wheel and the seat are in a
position for a much shorter driver but no trash or cigarette butts

it is all too weird
no X-files weird
but violated weird

the range of emotions have left me energized and confused

what was lost
is now found
that big piece of steel that I love so much is back thought it was out
of my life forever

truely wacky

1 comment:

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