a strange set of emotions

mouse number two
caught dead in the trap
pretty much like the last round with the traps
just as I felt was time to replace the bait and reset the already been tripped traps
there it was
dead mouse number two

the mixture of emotions is complex
there is a sense of joy and achievement in seeing the dead mouse
yet there is a small hint of compasion for the dead mouse
without much gore I took a look at the dead mouse
wondered if it died fast or died slow
at first glance it looked like the mouse had been caught on the arm
only to die slowly
but then at a closer look I saw that the bar of the trap had cracked right on his nose
which may have been an immediate death
at least as immediate as the crack down the back
it is tough to think about

the fact that mice are moderately cute does not help the situation
the soft grey fur and the lifeless body reminded me of the passing of my dog roscoe
a very painful moment for me
to have eye contact with my dog as he was put to sleep was a deeply painful moment

it is not the death of the mouse that brings me joy
it is the removal of the mouse
and the achieving of the goal
seeing a dead mouse for some reason makes me sad